You refuse to go on a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines

Your bookmark takes fifteen minutes to scroll from top to bottom.

You begin to wonder how on earth your service provider is allowed to call 200 hours per month "unlimited."

Your phone bill comes to your door in a box.

You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.

All of your friends have an " @ " in their names.

The last girl/guy you picked up was only a jpeg.

You start tilting your head sideways to smile :-)

Your eyeglasses have a website burned in on them.

You don't know the sex of your closest friends because they all have neutral nicknames.

You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved.

You kiss your girlfriend's home page instead of her.

You tell the cab driver you live at: http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html

You actually try that 123.elm.street address.

You wake up at 3:00 AM to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

You check your e-mail. It says no new messages, so you check it again.

Your fantasy dreams at night are in HTML.

And the number 1 reason you know you're addicted to the Internet when...

You get a tattoo that says, "This body is best viewed with Netscape 3.0 or higher."